founder of naked leader
I Love You Dad
Time to Read: 42 seconds
Naked Leader Week 1010 – 13 February 2023
I often think about my Dad, and never more so than In this Valentines week of love, as he died nine years ago, on 15th February 2014.
When he was alive I once complained to my wife Rosalind that he had managed my expectations when I was younger, had rarely if ever told me that he loved me, and never said he was “proud” of me.
She asked me how often I had told my dad that I loved him.
That question made me determined to do something – to take ownership of what I could control. I arranged a walking weekend in The Lake District, just him and I. My plan was to wait until the Sunday, and on a long walk, to ask him if he was proud of me.
We met on the Friday evening and went straight into dinner. The restaurant was very full, and we chatted about family and walking and all sorts of things. My dad and I have never been wine connoisseurs, so we asked the waitress which wine she would recommend. She suggested a something or other, and added that it was “number 42” on the wine list.
And my dad then spoke, to her, and said words that brought me instant peace.
He said “Ah, number 42. That will mean a lot to my son David – he finished his first book, The Naked Leader, at chapter 42. It is brilliant – I am so proud of him.”
To which the waitress smiled politely, and walked away.
Tears welled up in my eyes, and I looked at my dad, took his hand and told him that I loved him, too.
And then we said no more about it – he didn’t want to, and I didn’t need to.
With my love and best wishes to you all
David, I am so grateful that I too said the words ‘I love you’ to my beloved dad. I always felt very loved and knew he was proud of me but somehow neither parent ever used those three words to their children. I of course responded by telling my sons this every day and we now use them, and it still gives me a such a warm feeling when they tell me they love me. So some years before both parents died I plucked up courage (seems strange to have to do that) to say ‘I love you’ to each of them and then slowly, they responded. I am not sure why the words were more powerful than their actions – the opposite of ‘actions speak louder than words’, but in this case it meantsomething very special. Your account of that special time with your Father is so meaningful, thank you. Dianne