founder of naked leader

Seven How-Tos that build trust, rapport and influence – 2 of 2

Seven How-Tos that build trust, rapport and influence – 2 of 2

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Seven How-Tos that build trust, rapport and influence – 2 of 2

4. What is the other person’s most important outcome(s) that they want to achieve? – There is a very clever and little known technique for discovering what anyone actually wants – they will tell you!
And now, offer to help them achieve it – and actually do help them…

3. A Naked Leader chestnut – use ‘and’ not ‘but’. Psychologists have concluded that when we hear someone use the word “but” after we have put forward our point of view, the hairs on the back of our necks literally stand up in defence. ‘And’ makes someone, anyone, everyone much more receptive to what you are saying, and to you.
2.When you shake hands with someone, match their handshake grip exactly, let them dictate the personal space (you will feel it) and when you make eye contact wait for a split second before you smile. If you smile straight away their subconscious will not believe it is genuine. Oh yes, and if their handshake resembles either extreme of a wet fish or an iron grip, then simply bring your other hand over on top of theirs.
1. If you know who you will be meeting in advance, check them out in advance on LinkedIn, and when you meet them highlight something that you have in common (there is bound to be something), or something that particularly interests you about them. Now, you might be thinking – ‘the other person will know you got that from LinkedIn’ – exactly my point – you actually went to the trouble to do research on someone, and you remembered what it was when you met. A true and powerful double bubble of rapport building that has served Sir Richard Branson for many many years, just as it will you, if and only if you actually do it.


Please share how you get on with any or the abovein the comments below.

With my love and best wishes


5 Responses to Seven How-Tos that build trust, rapport and influence – 2 of 2

  1. Nothing is more infuriating than a man with a loose or weak handshake.
    I could never match someone like that, has to be full on and a prper grip, regardless of what grip they choose.
    Yes, get your knowledge of the person you are meeting online. Otherwise you really are on the back foot.

  2. The fact is, but is needed in place of and in some cases otherwise there wouldn’t be the need for the word.
    In an English exam, a child was asked, which one makes sense?
    “But for the two goals conceded, City would have won.’
    Or “And for the two goals conceded, City would have won.”

  3. I’ve never really got into Linkled In. But, sorry, AND do like the post as the handshake thing is a real one to remember.
    I too don’t like wishy/washy handshakes, have to be firm.
    Enlightening post!

  4. A man should kiss the cheek gently of a woman he knows and the handshake is a formal greeting for someone they don’t know.
    Such a difficult thing for a woman to replicate a man’s effort but i too prefer to give as good as i get when it comes to handshakes.

  5. As we meet someone we are meeting ourselves, what annoys us is not as important as what annoys them. Are we looking to connect and make a difference in peoples lives? Thank you David for all 7, it really helps me reflect on my intentions when meeting someone for the first time.

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