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The Formula for Guaranteed Failure

The Formula for Guaranteed Failure

Time to Read: Who cares – I loved writing this one!

The Formula for Guaranteed Failure (For you and your organisation)

Failure never happens by accident, it comes as a result of you following a specific process, an exact formula. You have the right to know this formula and, when you apply it knowingly, your failure will be inevitable.

Know not where you want to go – Focus on what you don’t want.

Then, when you keep achieving what you don’t want, you will be proved right – genius.

Know not where you are now – Be the very worst that you already are.

By complaining all the time – that life isn’t fair, so-called successful people are just ‘lucky,’ blame anyone and everyone (‘them’) and of course your parents.

Know not what you have to do – Keep saying ‘change’ over and over.

Talk about ‘change’ a lot without ever saying what you think needs to change. Chances are you will be promoted.

Don’t Do it! – Or, if at first you don’t succeed – give up.

And when people ask you ‘how are you?’ or ‘did you have a good weekend?’ make sure you tell them – make it last 10 minutes each time. It’s the legal way to suck out their lifeblood and a good way to use up your time.

And enjoy

Because they won’t

With no love and worst wishes

David
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7 Responses to The Formula for Guaranteed Failure

  1. Hiya, I was with you until you slated the benefits of small talk, i hate people that ask how are you…pointlessly if you dont want to know…dont bloody ask!

    bad morning?

    • Dreadful morning – not my fault, the weather’s too hot, everyone is STILL going on about the election and my cat has had the locks changed on the front door…thanks for asking though Chris – David

      • Fabulous response. Thoroughly enjoy your blog.

        I’m fortunate enough to work somewhere that is quite relaxed, we have a nice catch up monday mornings before getting stuck in.

        Keep an eye on that cat….

        Chris

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